Voices in My Head
by Mella Shane
Summary: Tweek Tweak is desperate to stop all the voices he hears. He's tormented by his own mind and the only way he knows how to stop it, is to take his own life. But someone manages to help him and he's unsure why. DON'T READ IF EASILY UPSET. Creek Oneshot.


Creek One-Shot, because why the hell not. I'm warning you, it's kind of sad. This hits close to home for me and I felt like writing about it. I needed some sort of motivation for my other stories and this kind of came to me in the middle of the night. So here it is, I hope you like it. If you could read, rate, review and all that good stuff.

Disclaimer: I don't own.

* * *

In the eyes of everyone else, I'm just a fuck up. I have crazy, untamable blonde locks that somehow match my personality, or what little of a personality I manage to have. The only thing that gets me through my day is coffee. I've been addicted to the stuff since I was four years old. Maybe that's when everything went wrong in my life, but it's too hard to tell. The only thing I do know is that fact that no one really likes me and I guess that it's my fault.

I'm just glad it's the last week of my high school life.

Let me rephrase that. It's the last week of my life in general.

Each and every morning I do the same damn thing. I wake up, grab clothes from the floor, horribly put them on, take a handful of medication with my coffee, and walk out the door. Nine times out of ten, I forget to put my shoes on, grab my backpack or worse; my thermos. But if it wasn't for my wonderful, perfect, completely sane mother, I would be more of a mess at school than I already am.

No matter, I walk to school in silence, without any friends by my side. I don't have inside jokes, plans for the upcoming weekend, or girls (or in my case, guys) to brag about, so I just go about my day.

Don't get me wrong, I use to have all that. I use to have a whole group of friends that somehow managed to tolerate me. But I think that changed when I beat the shit out of Clyde Donovan back in 8th grade.

The fucked up thing about it? I don't even remember why I did it. But that was when my life began to spiral downwards at a faster pace than I could ever imagine. That summer I was sent to a local mental hospital for young people. For most kids, the summer transitioning into High School is pretty important. You do things you never thought of doing. I on the other hand, was taking drugs that I still to this day cannot pronounce. So, when I returned to school the following year, everyone had changed… Except myself.

Well, I can't say that I didn't change. I did. I wasn't as much of a spaz as before. I was able to concentrate a little bit better. I guess I could thank the fifteen different pills I had to take each morning. But I also turned into a living zombie. I didn't talk unless needed to, I didn't eat unless I felt like it, I didn't participate in anything because why bother. I become a comatose shell of a person.

No one liked hanging around someone who had delayed reactions. I thought the jokes were funny, but it took my brain a few seconds longer to process everything than it did before. It didn't take long for everyone to just abandon me and never speak to me again. I was a nobody and at first, I was okay with it.

Then, I started getting angry. Well, I didn't get angry, the voices did. They started making noise when I went past Tokens house on Christmas break my freshman year. They told me to kill them all. Burn their house down while they're inside. If I wasn't happy, they couldn't be happy.

I fought off the noise as much as I could. I was able to prove them wrong for a little while, that I was happy. I was happy being alone twenty-four, seven. I didn't need friends; I would only slow them down. It lasted for about a year, maybe two I don't remember. On holidays or school events they would show back up, this time the hatred was aimed at me. _'You're nothing. Worthless. You're better off dead.'_ I was able to brush them off. My solution was drinking more and more coffee. It caused the jitters to knock them out of my head. But one day, they didn't go away.

I've been hearing them nonstop for the past month now and I now believe them.

I have a week left of school. I graduate this upcoming Thursday, but I can't take it. With no friends to celebrate with, nothing to look forward to in my adult life, I'm letting the voices win. Nothing matters anymore. Not friends, not my parents, not even my life. So I'm doing everyone a favor and leaving this world.

I guess I can thank you though Diary… You haven't made fun of me in all the years I wrote to you. I guess I could consider you a friend. But, it doesn't matter anymore… nothing does.

I guess I should get to the part about how I'm going to kill myself; I know you've been eagerly awaiting that.

All of my medication says 'Don't take with alcohol'. I'm going to fill my thermos up with my Dad's favorite brandy, take it to school with me one day this week and hope for the best. The best being my ultimate demise.

It's been nice knowing you over the years as you've kept all my secrets. Like, the first time I had a fantasy about Craig. He still to this day doesn't know, which I guess is a good thing. I thought that giving myself self service would help me out some days and sadly it never did. But, I guess the last thing I can think about when I'm dying is Craig with that smile that he rarely shows. He doesn't think anyone's watching him when he plays with his Guinea pigs outside on nice days. I guess that makes me a stalker… Oh well, not like it matters now. Or when I see him smile at lunch when he's watching Red Racer on his phone.

I remember back in 7th grade, when I was still friends with him and his Guinea pig Stripes died. I got him a stuffed anime guinea pig to make up for it. Obviously it wasn't anatomically correct, but it was the thought that counted… Right?

He probably threw it away once he hit high school. I still have all the presents the gang ever gave me.

Like the pop-up book on germs that Clyde gave me for my 10th birthday. Or the DVD of cats that Token gave me on Christmas one year. My most cherished possession though would have to be the tacky way too large for me cat sweater that Craig gave me out of the blue one year in middle school. I'm still so tiny that it fits me.

Sadly though, it doesn't bring me comfort like it use to.

Ah shit… The noises are acting up again. I need to take care of them. I feel like this will be the last time writing in you Diary, so with that… Thank you for keeping my secrets safe and being my friend.

* * *

Craig noticed something different about Tweek this morning. He couldn't put his finger on it, but he seemed… Different. The thin, yet tall, 18 year old boy with the same Chulo hat from elementary school narrowed his eyes at the boy a few rows in front of him.

The boy was slumped over his desk, giggling and talking to himself in harsh whispers. A few of his classmates glanced over ever so often with brows raised, but paid him no mind. This was normal for him, but Craig could tell that something was off.

Throughout the day, he periodically glanced over to the boy. It wasn't until the class before lunch that Craig knew something was really wrong. Tweak had always been ghostly pale, but Craig noticed the boy turning blue in the cheeks and around his mouth.

Teachers knew not to call on Tweek, due to the fact that the answer would always be wrong or it would take a good few minutes to even get him to speak. Thankfully (to Craig's surprise), Mr. Garrison who somehow had followed them to High School, called on the sickly blonde boy.

"Tweek, what is the answer to the question on the board? It's easy enough for an idiot like you to answer." A few of his classmates giggled a response. Craig though, scoffed silently under his breath but raised an eyebrow when Tweek lifted his head. The kids around him gasped and Mr. Garrison dropped the piece of chalk. "T-Tweek, are you alright?" He questioned. Craig turned his head to try and see what the slight commotion was about, but his eyes grew large as he noticed the boy was blue in the face while slightly foaming from his mouth.

"P-Pressure…" He managed to mumble before falling to the floor. Everyone around him backed up in shock. A girl or two shrieked. Craig did something no one ever expected. He jumped from his seat and ran over to Tweeks side.

"Call the ambulance." He said in a raised, monotone voice. Craig picked up Tweek and ran him to the nearest bathroom, which to his luck, was right next door. Craig, carrying Tweek bridal style kicked open to door and the nearest bathroom door. He gently, but quickly, placed Tweek down by the toilet and rolled up his sleeve. "Damnit Tweek…" He mumbled as he pried open the boys mouth and shoved his finger down his throat. After a few seconds, he could feel his hand being covered in vomit and did the best he could to aim it in the toilet.

"Craig!" Clyde called as he slammed open the bathroom door. Craig had forgotten that Clyde was in the same class as him.

"Over here…" He mumbled as he patted Tweeks back. Waves and waves of bile released from the small boys stomach. Craig could smell the booze from each heave as well as see some undigested pills. Clyde walked in front of the door and pointed towards Tweek.

"The paramedics are here…" Clyde sniffled as he watched Tweek continuously throw up. Craig gave a small nod as he continued to pat and rub Tweeks back, staying silent. "I have Tweeks bag…" Using the hand on Tweeks back, Craig reached for his bag. Clyde handed it over and walked back outside. "He's in here!" He yelled.

It didn't take long for the paramedics to enter the room, strap Tweek to a board and carry him out of the school. Craig didn't care that he still had his ex best friends vomit on his hand and forearm. He just wanted to know why he was foaming from the mouth. He entered Mr. Garrisons room, grabbed his own bag and walked out of the school.

He walked to Starks pond and pulled out a crumbled packet of cigarettes from his bag. After lighting one up, he took a deep inhale and closed his eyes. The smoke swirled around in his lungs for a few moments before he blew it out and took a seat on a vacant bench. His curiosity got to him as he stared at Tweaks book bag.

"Heh…" He mumbled to himself, it was the color of a coffee bean. He didn't realize why it took him so long to notice it. He unzipped the larger section of the bag and dug around. After finding useless pieces of paper and binders, he moved on to the next compartment. Something dark green caught his eye. 'Tweak's Diary', it read.

He doesn't know how long he sat there, but by the time he got up, it was past dark. Craig Tucker had been crying. For the past few hours he had been reading the demise of Tweek Tweak, his old best friend.

"Damnit!" He yelled loudly as he began sprinting towards Hell's Pass Hospital. He didn't know if he was too late but he was hoping that there was still time.

"We're not sure if he's going to make it… There was a lot of alcohol in his system and with the medicine he was taking for his condition… It's a lethal concoction." The doctor said to the crying and hysterical parents of the boy in the bed. "He's only stable now because of the boy in his class… Craig Tucker I believe it is. If he didn't make the boy throw up when he did… It might have been a lot worse for your son." Mr. and Mrs. Tweak looked towards each other, confused as to why the Tucker boy helped their son out, but their thoughts were interrupted as the doctor continued to talk. "He's in a coma, but we aren't sure if he will ever wake up from it." The doctor sighed, but extended his hand. "We will do the best we can." Mr. Tweak shook the man's hand. After the doctor left he turned to his son, tears silently flowing down his face.

The Tucker boy sat out in the waiting room. Clyde and Token by his side. They both looked at each other and sighed.

"I never thought it would get this bad man… Why didn't you ever tell him why you pushed him out of the group?" Token asked Craig. The boy sighed and slid down in his chair.

"I didn't think he would feel the same way… How was I to know the kid liked me back?" Clyde shook his head.

"We all knew it dude. We could tell just by the way his large twitchy eyes managed to stare at you. You kept his attention better than most things could…" Craig scoffed as he shook his head. "I mean it dude. You didn't see it because he always sat behind you in class, but I could see it every time I would turn to pass you a note. The boy loved you."

"And that's saying something since Clyde has a horrible time knowing if someone likes someone else." Token jested, causing Clyde to huff and slap the black boy. Token laughed but grew silent. "It's true. I saw it too. Every time I invited him to my Christmas party, he would decline because he didn't want to upset you because of how you acted towards him…"

"Fuuuuck man…" Craig exhaled as he ran a hand through his head. He heard a cough a few feet in front of the boys and looked up, quickly regaining his posture as he noticed Tweeks parent's in front of him.

"C-Craig?" Mrs. Tweak said through a sniffle. She tried to smile, but her lip quivered as she broke out into tears. Craig stood and although towering over the woman he remained silent.

"We just wanted to say thank you… Our son talked a lot about you when you all were still friends… It…" Mr. Tweak stopped talking for a moment to gather his thoughts. "It means a lot to us… Tweek is in a Coma and they're unsure if he will wake up. We just wanted to say thank you for helping out son out." Craig felt his face go pale at the mention of a coma. He shook his head and bit his bottom lip.

"Yeah… No problem. Tweek was a friend to us even if we did fuck him over…" Clyde and Token took that as a cue to stand up and add into the conversation.

"Craig really is the hero right now. We will stand by Tweek's side to make sure he gets better." Clyde said, giving a strong nod. Mrs. Tweak gave a small smile as she rubbed her nose with a tissue.

"I'll have my father send over some good doctors too. I know he won't mind Mr. and Mrs. Tweak." The Tweak's looked to each other and shook their heads.

"O-Oh no, we couldn't afford it, thank you for the offer though boys." Token bit his lip but gave a nod. He looked to Clyde and took a step back. He pulled his phone out and did a few different things, leaving the others to talk. "We need to get back home, but thank you… You can't see Tweek just yet, but I believe tomorrow you'll be able to." The two gave a nod as Mr. Tweak led his wife out of the hospital.

Every day, Craig, Clyde and Token visited Tweek. His condition was staying the same which wasn't good or bad, but it worried everyone around them.

* * *

Graduation came and went; the whole class was different at the absence of Tweek. Although he didn't believe he had an effect on everyone, his absence was proving different.

After graduation, the Tweak's had a surprise. Token's father had paid for the best doctors from around the world to come over to Hell's Pass and help out Tweek. His parents refused, but after finding out it was a gift, they accepted the offer and to theirs and everyone else's surprise, Tweek was making a quick recovery.

'_Beep…..Beep…..Beep…' _

"Nnngh…" The thin, frail, and hooked up to multiple machines boy mumbled. His head turned against the pillow on the bed as he slowly opened his eyes. It took a few moments for them to adjust to the bright lights, but as soon as he made the room aware of his consciousness, he felt a large body crying against his. "M-Mom?" He mumbled as he blinked some more to try and focus on the body, the only thing he could see was a blue hat and a black tuff of hair.

"God damnit Tweek! Why didn't you tell us you were sick!? Why didn't you tell us you were in pain? We didn't mean to push you away bu-but we thought it was for the best!" The boy on top of Tweek mumbled through his chest. Tweek laughed awkwardly, unsure of what was going on.

"H-Huh?" He weakly said. The boy on his chest lifted his head up. Tweek gasped at how blue the boys eyes were through his fit of crying. Clyde entered the room at the right time. With bags of junk food in his hand he dropped it and quickly ran over to Tweeks side. Token was right behind Clyde and after seeing the commotion he ran back out into the hall.

"He's awake!" Token began to yell, doctors upon doctors and more nurses than Tweek could count began to enter the room. Craig was off the boy and quickly out in the hall, on his phone with Tweeks parents.

"P-Pressure!" The boy yelled as the doctors began to prick him, asking him multiple questions. "Wh-What?" He constantly asked. He tried to block out the bright florescent light, but realized it was impossible from all the contraptions in his arm.

It took a few hours for everything to calm down, and for Tweek to be alone with his parents and his main doctor. The doctor was beaming.

"You're stabilized. Your vitals are in good shape. But we will need to keep you here for a bit longer to see what medicines to put you on." He looked to Tweek and smiled. "You won't be on nearly as many medicines as before. The mental doctor you went to see a few years back is under examination by the medical board for putting you under so many medications. The side effect you've been experiencing all these years?" The doctor asked. Tweek raised an eyebrow.

"Y-You mean like the voices and me a-acting like a –nngh- zombie?" He questioned. The doctor gave a nod.

"It's because of a medicine that wasn't approved by the medical board. It's from a tribe out in Africa. I don't know all the details, but you should be a lot better once it leaves your system." Tweek gave a slight nod, still unsure of everything that's going on. "Do you have any questions?"

"How –nngh- long have I been in a coma?" He asked as he looked around the room. Balloons, presents, cards and slightly wilted flowers decorated the small hospital room.

"For about six months. You'll have to go through therapy for a little while, maybe start College next year. But you'll be okay." Tweek somehow managed to smile at this. His mother was crying and his father was smiling.

"T-Thanks.." He mumbled, a blush crossing his thin and pale cheeks. He managed to bring his hands up to his face slightly, rubbing at his cheeks for a moment.

"Well, I have other patients to see, the nurse will be by shortly to give you your medication. I promise it's only one pill, not fifteen." The doctor joked, but went towards the door. "It's good to see you awake Tweek, there are a lot of happy people out here waiting to see you." Tweek tilted his head in surprise.

"People w-want to see me?" He questioned as he turned to look at his parents. They both gave nods.

"We will let them in, we need to call the relatives and let them know you're awake. " Mrs. Tweak walked over and gave her son a kiss on the forehead before she exited the room with her husband in tow. As soon as they left, Craig appeared at the door with a large box in his hand.

"Tweek…" He mumbled as he looked the boy over. Tweek turned away, a scowl on his face. "Tweek, I'm so sorry for everything." The boy approached Tweek's bed. He placed the box down on Tweeks lap. "I'm sorry for pushing you away, for not showing you my true feelings…" Tweek turned at this as his eyes grew large.

"H-How… You read it. How –nngh- could you!?" Tweek yelled, Craig flinched as he turned away.

"It was after the incident. I shouldn't have looked, but I wanted to see if I could help you." He turned to look out the window. "It appears I did. I told the doctors everything and it seems that they were able to help you…" Tweek lowered his head, but twitched.

"But why… Why did you save me? I wanted to –nngh- die…" Tweek grew silent. The air was thick with tension as Craig sighed.

"I saved you because I love you. I saw you dying and reacted the only way I knew how." Tweek's eyes grew large as he heard Craig speak, but he continued. "I've loved you all these years. I let you slip through my fingers as I didn't want anyone to know about my feelings for you. That's why we stopped talking. That's why I made the boys push you away as well. They apparently knew that you loved me back, but I didn't want to believe it." Craig slammed his hands down on the window ledge. "I didn't want to believe any of it… But when I saw your life slipping away in that class room… I knew I needed to do something…" Craig turned around and stared at Tweek. "Thank your diary for me too, because it really showed me the true you… The Tweek I had been missing out on these past few years."

"Craig…" Tweek began, but was quickly cut off by the lips of Craig smashing onto his. Tweek yelped, but closed his eyes as he fell into the kiss. Craig put his hand on the back of Tweek's neck, pushing himself closer to the boy. After a few moments, he pulled away as his eyes were tearing up again.

"I'm going to make up for all the years I pushed you away. I swear I will." Craig backed up out of the room, leaving Tweek there by himself. He looked down to the box that was on his lap. Nervously, he opened it up and was quite surprised by the object in the box.

With obvious wear, it was the stuffed Guinea pig that Tweek had gotten Craig. Tweek's hazel eyes teared up as he pulled the Guinea pig towards his chest. Underneath it was a note. With shaky hands, he pulled out the note and began to smile through silent tears.

"This was the only thing to get me through losing you. We will never be apart ever again. This is my promise to you Tweek."

* * *

**Well, if people like this, I'll write an epilogue. So… Yay! **


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